501st
TROOP REPORT: Bushfire Appeal - Poolrite Equipment
Friday, February 13th, 2009 | 501st, Work | 7 Comments
Date: Friday, 13th February, 2009
Venue: Poolrite Equipment, Queensland.
Time: 0900 - 1500
Mission: Collect Donations for the Victorian Bushfire Appeal, Seek Out Rebels and enforce Imperial Order.
Detail:
The element of surprise was essential for this troop. I snuck into the building via the side entrance, while some Empire sympathisers created a diversion with Krispy Kreme Donuts. It took serious focus to avoid the box of fresh iced donuts…
Once I was suitably attired, I ventured forth to make my presence known to the locals. Many of the employees were shocked and excited to see me - most of whom cheerfully filled my collection tin with generous donations. Those that weren’t so generous were threatened or arrested.
At one point, it seemed the locals needed a little help. I aided their Warehousing and Sales departments, before fielding some IT Support calls. Their ‘Complaints Department’ has never been so efficient - or so quiet…
A few local businesses, upon hearing that I was in the neighbourhood, persuaded me to visit them by offering substantial donations to the cause. I was humbled and, for the first time in my life, left totally speachless.
I didn’t anticipate the overwhelming support and joy that I was met with. I still cant quite believe just how generous the public has been. Some of the folk today have been personally affected by the Bushfires - many of the staff have relatives and family members in the Bushfire area. They shared their stories with me, as they stuffed large amounts of money into my donation tin.
Today, I am proud to be an Australian Trooper. I am proud of the way this community have rallied around those less fortunate. I am proud, humbled, and awed to state that $24,596.80 was put in my tin for the victims of the Victoria Bushfires.
Even as I type out this brief mission report, donations are still being stuffed into my tin.
Trooper Attendance: TK 6232 “Moxxxie”
Injuries:Very few, for a change. Some minor armour bites to the left arm. May be worth shortening the left shoulder bell strap.
Malfunctions: My right hand guard fell off - twice. Will need to reinforce the velcro with some elastic strapping.
Public Incidents: A few vehicles showed their support by flashing their lights and honking their audible notification systems.
Mission Status:
An overwhelming success.
TROOP: Mater Childrens’ Hospital
Monday, January 19th, 2009 | 501st, Troop Reports | No Comments
Photos pending.
Venue: Mater Childrens’ Hospital
Time: 1000 hours - 1200 hours
Mission: The mission was to safeguard the Starlight Express Room for the local constabulary, while they presented the Mater Hospital with a charity cheque.
Details: Oz_Scout made contact with the local Constabulary, who organised the location and the time of the cheque presentation ceremony. Once we arrived and kitted up, Captain Starlight suggested we visit the wards to meet all the current residents. We spent the next hour or so walking around the rooms and meeting various people, introducing ourselves and taking photos. At one point, I stuffed up my TKID - The Squad Leader cant punish me because he buggered his up also.
Trooper Attendance: Moxxxie, Oz_Scout
Wranglers: TK-TEX
Injuries: One slight pinch of my left knee. Nothing to speak of.
Malfunctions: The velcro attaching my ab and butt plates came unstuck, so I had a very attractive black dangley thing hanging off the back of my butt. Thankfully, my fellow trooper identified the malfunction before the public became aware of it.
Public Incidents: The local carpark was a total nightmare.
Mission Status: Success
Quotable Quotes:
“… Have you happened to see any Wookies lately?”
“Yep”
“Really? Where abouts?”
“At my house.”
“At your house? What was he doing there?”
“Well… he’s my Dad.”
o.O
What are you supposed to say to that?? Kids, eh! They’ll say the darnedest things.
2008 - A Year in Review
Friday, January 2nd, 2009 | Uncategorized | No Comments
Well, I’m slightly relieved that I survived 2008. It was a year filled with huge highs, and mega lows. In fact, in the space of 12 months I have completely changed my whole aspect on life. I guess that could be considered a great achievement, but it has come with a significant cost.
The year started fairly well. New Years Eve 2007 kicked off at the Brisbane Town Hall, all frocked up and set to stun. Despite the fact that I was rubbing shoulders with very beautiful people, I felt good about myself and about my little world. In fact, when a certain somebody whispered in my ear that “2008 is going to be our year, baby” I actually believed it. Ha! Funny how some things turn out.
2008 certainly wasn’t “our” year. On April 1st, 2008 the shit officially hit the fan. The legal shit took a few months to sort out, but the fallout included sorting out property and the custody of a furry-child. The whole affair will always be a major landmark in my life, as all at once the shared hopes and dreams came to a clattering full-stop. I’ll never be able to show my gratitude to my family and friends for the way that they all closed ranks around me. There was never a short supply of shoulders to cry on.
However, the best piece of advice came from Papa Bear.
Throughout your life, you need to surround yourself with people that will be there to support you if things get rough. If you’re unlucky enough to fall off a cliff, you want to know that your friends and chosen family will be there to grab hold of you. Whats more, you want to know that when they’re holding you, they will never ever let go.
I have people in my life that will never ever let go. So, 2008 became a cross-roads for me. I decided, quite consciously, to bite off more than I could chew, and then just chew like buggery.
I renovated my kitchen. I landscaped my backyard. I threw my hat into the ring at work, and decided to take on the biggest project of my career.
Everybody told me that it’d never happen, my project would never see the light of day. I half agreed with them, but also kept reminding myself that fortune favors the brave.
“Fuck it, lets just give it a crack and see where it takes me. I’ve got nothing better to do with my time.”
My new kitchen is now finished, my backyard looks great, and the contracts at work are now all signed, and sorted. I have achieved something that I never thought I’d get to see. When everything went through, I couldn’t stop grinning. I threw myself a few high-fives, and called my family to celebrate. It made a nice change to have to call them with good news!
My family and friends have had their own share of bad news this year. My Grandma and Uncle were both diagnosed with cancer. Cancer also took the life of one of my cousins. Without dwelling on the bad news, we’ve also had a lot of good news.
Ava Grace, and Hannah Jean were both born in 2008, and my cousin also got engaged.
The Richmond football team still didn’t make the finals, but we’ll give it another tilt in 2009.
This year, I managed to try a lot of things for the very first time. I played underwater hockey, I got my belly button pierced, I tried (and failed at) internet dating, I completed a PRINCE2 Practitioners course, I helped invent a cocktail, I bartered website work for jewelry, I went on a Thai cooking course, I wore fake eyelashes for the first time, I did Jagermeister shots, I bought my own set of Stormtrooper armour and joined the Fighting 501st.
The 501st was a bit of a lucky find. I actually read a review about a documentary made on the 501st which piqued my curiosity. I had to find out more. So, I went to the main website http://www.501st.com and read all about the work they do for charities and the madcap Starwars love they spread. I was hooked, and I simply had to know more.
I visited the local squad during one of their “troops”. There were about 10 stormtroopers, and biker scouts having fun with the crowd and raising money for the Starlight Foundation. In fact, the local constabulary even got in on the fun and let one of the guys jump on his bike. Even Vader had a bit of a run selling fairground tickets. I decided that this was something worthwhile.
I bought my own set of armour a few weeks later and I’m now very proud to say that I have been officially accepted into the 501st fold. I am TK6232 of the Redbacks Squad, as part of the Terror Australis Garrison. Wookies and Jedi beware!!
So, I now head into 2009 armed with a bunch of hard-won wisdom and a bucketful of optimism. I feel, for the first time in many years, like I have the capacity to do anything I set my mind to. In the last year, I’ve met some amazing people and despite the hardships, had quite a lot of fun. And that, I think, is the secret to happiness.
Looking forward to a wicked and wonderful 2009,
Jac xx
TK6232 reporting for duty
Wednesday, December 24th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments
Yes, it’s official. I am a nerd.
My 501st Approval email came through yesterday, and I was so giddy that I didn’t have the composure to blog about it. It would have lost something in translation and appeared something like:
OMFG!!!11!!!!! DUUUUDE!!! B!!! *dies*
Which, is to say that it would have been unintelligible dribble. Still, I’m ever so excited about the whole thing and cannot wait to kick start 2009 with a really good Troop.
First Tour of Duty - Mater Hospital
Monday, December 22nd, 2008 | Uncategorized | 1 Comment
This weekend I did something pretty cool. Ok, I did a few things that were pretty cool, but one of those involved strapping white ABS plastic to myself and behaving like a lunatic. All in the name of fun.
My first Tour of Duty involved fronting up to the Mater Hospital and trooping around the Childrens wards delivering Star Warsy christmas gifts to the kids. I felt like a total prat and a complete fraud, right up until the first parent came over with the worlds biggest smile and shook my hand.
“Thank you! You guys are amazing! You’ve made my sons day!”
And, right at that point I was sold. I couldn’t stop smiling. It didn’t matter that my armour was digging into my thigh and my hip, it didn’t matter that my belt kept slipping or my shoulder kept flipping - nor did it matter that I had had only 3 hours sleep. I would have stayed in that suit for half a year, and had to be asked twice to get out of costume. I am now a total 501st groupie.
FOR THE EMPIRE! FOR THE MIGHTY 501st! I cant wait to do it again.
Stormtrooper’s Lenses
Friday, December 19th, 2008 | Uncategorized | No Comments
FYI: Stormtroopers have dark tinted lenses in their helmets.
Now, you’d think that when you bought a Stormtrooper helmet, these dark tinted lenses would be pre-installed. Sadly, the tinting was overlooked on my “bucket”, which left me wondering where the hell do Stormtroopers go to buy their Optometrical requirements? I just made up Optometrical.
In any case, where do you purchase Stormtrooper Helmet Lenses from? The answer? eBay. You can buy them from eBay for about $15 a pair. $15! Plus postage! Not acceptable. Not at all.
So, I get my creative-thinking cap on and try and work out another way of doing things.
I grabbed some reject plastic from work to try and cut out the right shape. It all sounded good in theory, until it came time to clean off the permanent marker. I grabbed some solvent, and started cleaning. It cleaned most of the permanent marker off the plastic, but also cleaned most of the plastic off the plastic as well. Epic fail. I needed a Plan B.
So, back to the drawing board. I then spent a good while wandering aimlessly around Bunnings to no avail. No Stormtrooper lenses to be had anywhere in the big green shed. Of course, I did pick up some random hinges, and a few new concepts for making my stormy armour even more wearer-friendly - but nothing to help my lens issue.
Then, sheerly by chance, I wandered past a Window Wonderland outlet which had a brand new window tinting display. There were 20-25 different samples of various shades of tinting and my mind had a little explosion. *bing* went the big lightglobe above my head. Of course! Tinting offcuts!
So, armed with a nice smile, high heels and a tight little skirt, I wandered into the local window tinting shop hoping for some pretty offcuts which I could fashion into lens shaped thingos ready to install in my Stormtrooper helmet. Turns out the high heels and the skirt were totally uncalled for because the dude in their installation shed was actually a dudette. Oh well. She still gave me offcuts to make a million lenses.
Mission Optometrical Status: Total Success.
My TK is going to be the coolest cat in the squad. I now have aviator style lenses.
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