Movie Geek

Thursday, July 3rd, 2003 | Doyle Reviews | No Comments

After the excitement of X2 and Matrix:Reloaded has evaporated, I was left wondering… “Well? What next?”

Of course, like any proper movie geek, all eyes are forward towards “Return of the King” when Peter Jackson unroll the final episode in the marvellous Lord of the Rings trilogy. For that, I simply cannot wait.

But that’s a whole 5 months and 15 days away… But who’s counting?

So I figured I’d try and find something to look forward to in the meantime. Roll up Apple Trailers. Yay! for broadband and Yay! for online trailers!!!

First cab off the rank, a good old Chick Flick.
Legally Blonde 2: Red, White and Blonde. The first movie was a real surprise. I’m not much of a “ditzy cheerleader” type, so I thought I was going to sleep through the entire movie, or patiently wait til the ritual After Movie Coffee.

I surprised myself. I enjoyed it. It didn’t take itself too seriously, which I think was the most important thing about the whole flick. The sequal looks like it’s taken all the good parts from the first one (even that rat-arsed little dog), mushed them all up and pressed them into a new moulde. Politics.

Opens July 2.

THEN.

*cue dramatic style music*
UNDERWORLD

Words cannot adequatly describe.

Looks and sounds like “Matrix” crossed with “The Crow” crossed with “Dracula 2000″. For the fangirls: Scott Speedman looking all scruffy and lovable. For the fanboys: Kate Beckinsdale and a lot of leather.

Go check out the trailer. Tell me I’m not alone in the fangirl excitement.

First Matrix review

Tuesday, May 13th, 2003 | Doyle Reviews | 4 Comments

Mirror.co.uk - FIRST REVIEW OF STUNNING NEW MATRIX MOVIE

Read it if you dare. I dare not.

“KEANU Reeves turned his moribund career around by taking the part of Neo. But it could have been a lot different. Ewan McGregor and Will Smith both turned down the part before the Speed star snapped it up.”

Will Smith? The hell? As one Slashdotter said..

“Imagine Will Smith getting Neo’s role then doing the soundtrack to Matrix. That would have been a disaster of Battlefield Earth meets Wild Wild West proportions.”

*hehehe* Love geeks.

Two Towers Trailer.

Monday, September 30th, 2002 | Doyle Reviews | No Comments

The Lord of the Rings : Official Movie Site

Holy Squeeking Mouseshit Batman.

I just caught the TTT trailer. It was about 2cm’s wide and the sound quality was comparible to listening to a Hawaiian radio station from Australia… but… oh dear god.

I had the shivers, the shakes, the trembles and I had to bite my hand to stop myself from squeeking with glee. IT - IS - AWESOME.

I cant wait. I cant wait. I’m supposed to be in Canada for the opening, but be damned if I dont want to reorganise the trip so that I can be in Wellington….

AIIIII. I want it to be December now!!!
Doyle. In a fangirl frenzy.

New RB User Icon.

Wednesday, September 25th, 2002 | Doyle Reviews, Fiction, Likely Image, Personality tests | No Comments

Lookie… New Icon.

I just HAD to add the flashy animation bit to it. Wasn’t geeky enough as it was.

Its 1am. I’m wide awake, and in no fit state to do any work. My thoughts are currently jumping like crazy. If I even attempted to program/thesis I’d end up with some whacked out document that would make Mr Supervisor reassess his opinion of my sanity.

Not like he already thinks I’m a space case, or anything…. But there’s no need to convince him of the fact.

One minute I’m pondering my fic, which is finally finished, wondering if I shouldn’t edit a few pages… I honestly think that the fight scene isn’t realistic enough. Needs blood.

The next second, I’m doing some nutty personality quiz. I discovered that I wear PJ’s to bed, and that the “what weirdo are you” quiz is broken. I dont really think I need some computer program to define what weirdo I am, anyway.

Then, inspired to write a “Doyle Review” on “Chain of Fools” which I hired out tonight on the OneDollar Tuesday deal.
It was very much like an american “lock stock”.
Elijah Wood was a hitman.
Enough for a giggle, but not all that memorable.

Then, I wander over and check out how many new members Ringbearer has now. ITs been open less than 24 hours, and we now have 61 Registered Members. Huh. 5 minutes ago we only had 58.

Then, I get inspired to upload 30 new TTT images, then loose motivation as soon as the FTP program opens itself.

Eh.

xXx

Sunday, September 15th, 2002 | Doyle Reviews | No Comments

Vin Diesel is xXx.
Holy bulging arm muscles Batman!

Ok, so the plot is kinda basic. Bad man wants to take over the world with a crazy new invention. Very Bond-ish. Naturally, there’s a pretty girl involved. Again, 007? However, this guy isn’t 007. According to one of the frequent one-liners, X is 009.5″

Ar Har.

But seriously. The music was good. The special effects good. The stunts - Awesome. In all, it was a boys flick full of fast cars, bare arsed girls and high powered explosives.

I loved it.

Not only did they have the scattered ass to entertain the males within the crowd, Vin was there to entertain all of the ladies - a significant proportion of the audience.

And. Did. He. Entertain? Oh… *hell* yes!

I want me a man like that one. Gift wrapped and waiting for me under the Christmas Tree. Sorry Dom…

It was worth the $7 entry price simply to gaze longingly at the bald headed bad ass. Big? This guy isn’t big. He’s a man MOUNTAIN.

I really enjoyed this flick. It was light, fast paced, and dressed to thrill. Not to mension a seriously devious bad guy played by LOTR’s Martin Csokas. Who, I may add, did a fan-fucking-tastic job.

Go see this film if you liked “Fast and the Furious”, “Long Kiss Goodnight” or “Mission Impossible (#1)”

Doyle.

It still sank

Saturday, May 25th, 2002 | Doyle Reviews | No Comments

It still sank

Watched Titanic last night. It was aided by a bottle of white and quantities of nibblies. Now, before you get the wrong idea about me, I only watched it becasue I haven’t seen it in the 5 years since I saw it at the Cinema - I was curious to know how it had degraded over time.

Those special effects that were really good? They’re now crap.

The characters which most of us liked? Well… Leo’s still crap. How could some bloke really look that young?

The logistics, and the “why dont they just” factor has increased, and I know that had I have been there, i would have survived no hassles at all.

Firstly, the Titanic was designed to be ‘unsinkable’ if only 4 hull panels were breached. Unfortunatly for the poor bastards aboard, they breached 5 on the sideswipe of that sodding ice berg. If they had’ve hit the thing nose first, well.. everybody’d probably be whinging about a few bruised heads, but they wouldn’t have sunk. Says alot about Ice-burg air-bags, really….

Once they knew that the ship was going to go down, why didn’t they set about creating rafts out of doors, beds, chairs, anything wooden?? Phhhhh. Really. I would have built myself the HMAS Doyle. Greatest ship ever to be built out of second-hand wood planks.

(cue blatant nationalistic predjudice)
And really. If the crowd had’ve been Australian, they would have built the raft and saved the brandy. I dont know too many aussies who didn’t weep at the loss of such fine alcohol. Lots of wood lashed together would have stayed afloat for hours and hours. Enough time to get significantly pissed, and greet the rescue party with bawdy versions of “My heart will go on….”