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April 22, 2002
The Homerfactor. Now, I'm not
The Homerfactor.
Now, I'm not trying to anger the gods, nor am I trying to sing and dance about my IQ... but... wouldn't it have been easier if I was born with the brain the size of a goldfish? They have a superior lifestyle, and lead lives that are free of stress, and free from the hassles of bill-paying and assignment-study.
(admittedly not ~MY~ goldfish, as they tend to kark it before adulthood)
All fish have to do is swim around, and ... do nothing! I admit, it would be a bit difficult to work the remote control without thumbs, but it's not the biggest loss. Fish are happy. Fish get enough sleep, and they have peaceful lives. Fish don't have Computer Graphics assignments to keep them up til 3.30am.
Any way you look at it, being a goldfish seems unbelievable compared with the drudgery, the stress and the nightmares associated with having brains.
It has been hypothesised that life as an idiot would be so much easier. Nobody would expect you to do anything, and you could live your life on your own terms. The hardest decision would be "Oprah, or Jerry?", and a complex algorithm would involve the complex task of getting a beer from the fridge.
To be "Homer Simpson" is the epitamy of human existence. It is the zen, and is the state of Nirvana that all Hindus strive for. It is the pinicle of evolution, and the dreams of many.
I wish I could be an idiot.
I wish I could be too big and stupid to realise that I don't know anything, to thickheaded and dull to realise that I'm not going to get this assignment finished, and too brain fried to care.
*raises a glass* To Homer Simpson. You lucky son of a bitch.
Posted by Jacqui at April 22, 2002 09:37 PM